Life dumbfounded.

Really what do I know? Zero. I've created an artificial life within my mind. But it is flimsy as leaves blowing in a breeze.

Sunday morning people are driving me crazy. The man who wants to talk in train times and getting to where he needs to be at the correct time. What is the correct time? There is no time. There are no intervals. There is no before or after. The essence of life is now. To live now escapes the meaningless; it escapes depression and anxiety. I made no attempt to see this person at all, but he jumped up and down in myopia: be gone!

I don't know how people work. How they operate. Is this because they truly don't exist? Bless them anyway because they are still maintaining an illusion which is my own nothingness.

I've just realised that no-one exists at all as I perceive them, which means I know no-one at all because they have no existence and I have no true memory, of people as they actually are, to relate to.

I've been aware I have no control of anything at all for sometime. But now I realise I know nothing at all. Is this a revelation in which I know nothing exists at all? Is this insanity or is it awakening?